To: "Don Elliott" <[censored by SEF web site]>
de> Hey Fred,
Greetings, Don! Hopefully you've decided to provide
the information you neglected to provide the last time
you wrote. Remember? SUV weight and dick size? It's
for our records and I assure you we'll be discrete.
de> I have some advice for you.
Excellent! One thing we here at the Stop Elmer Fudd
web site certainly appreciate and enjoy is free advice
-- more so when it comes from Elmers. In fact without
the support of Elmers -- or Creationists and other
inbred morons of such ilk -- the Internet would be
_so_ much less fun. }:-}
We welcome any advice your type cares to offer.
de> If you write emails filled with hate as well as
Golly, that _is_ valuable advice indeed!
de> In five minutes I had your home address, phone
Well you must certainly be quite the super detective,
Don! It's not just anybody who can get on the Internet
and find somebody's home address, phone number, or
thousands of postings to newsgroups. It takes a
special intellect; a real and powerful man with an
SUV some where around 6,000 pounds and a dick size
right around 4 inches to do all that, you know.
Yep, tools like Google aren't easy to master, after
all. I applaud your superior intellect, Don. Really.
de> You are a very sad person.
Part of that highly evolved, super detective work of
yours of which you spoke earlier, I'm sure. }:-}
Hey, Columbo? We've found your equal!
de> Don't have much of a life do you?
Well now that's kind of a difficult metric to classify
with any degree of accuracy, you know. When it comes
to the matter of _quality_ of life, one of the major
down point is having Elmers out there slaughtering us
on the highways, spraying small arms fire in our hills
and canyons, and generally having to deal with the
typical right-wing Republican morons you seem to be
in tune with.
On the plus side, your type are often amusing! I mean
it wouldn't be fun if you clowns weren't so laughable.
I mean shit, man! When you see some rightard Elmer
coming down the hill in a 6,000 pound SUV with the
suspension jacked up and snow tires on in August, it's
_such_ a laugh. Priceless amusement, in fact. }:-}
'Course when he rolls and slaughters a family of five,
that's not quite so amusing.
de> I truly feel sorry for you.
We appreciate your concern, here. We really do.
de> Honestly, you won't believe this but the people you
Ah but Don, nobody cares: irrelevant. 50,000 deaths
on America's highways every year and 2,000 of them
were caused by Elmer Fudds whose only excuse is that
their penis is too small and they needed to "man up" by
playing pretend on America's highways.
It's irrelevant that Elmers hate normal people: that
they're killing us because of their sexual dysfunction
is what's relevant.
de> They just think you're an idiot.
<laughing> Golly, that _is_ a disappointment. <rofl!>
de> This type of activism is exactly why you won't win
That's okay, Don. I could understand how you must feel.
The inability to even mention the weight of the vehicle
you drive because it _accurately_ reflects the likely
size of your dick is something most Elmers can't get
through.
Do me a favor, though, would you? Let all of your Elmer
friends out there know the web site's URL so they can
send me frankly bizarre but amusing emails as well,
won't you?
I'd appreciate it! Thanks!
From: "'Stop Elmer Fudd'" <feedback@elmerfudd.usREMOVE>
Subject: Thank you for your kind words, Don!
Date: Sun, 14 Nov 2004 14:24:03 -0500
de> Web Sites, you should keep you personal information
de> about yourself more private.
de> number, and the thousands of posts to newsgroups.
de> hate so much do not share your hatred for you.
de> any arguments or friends who are sane. Obsessing
de> over other guy's penis sizes is an odd character
de> trait.
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