We here at the Stop Elmer Fudd web site understand that some of our
visitors might be Elmers that have had someone explain how to turn on
a computer, explained how to connect to the Internet, and explained
how to acess web sites -- like this one.
Because of this, we understand that on rare occasion an Elmer or two
will accidentally stumble across this web site -- while looking for
good deals on Commemorative Plates -- or maybe trying to research
why his SUV keeps catching on fire every time he beats his wife.
So for you Elmers, the person you want to contact is Agent Mark
Blevins at mblevins@fbi.gov and
he would love to hear from you! In addition you might consider calling
up your local FBI offices and describe to them everything you don't
like about this web site. In fact it's your Christian Duty!
to call up your local FBI offices and report on your neighbor like a
good German. You're encouraged to do so, Elmer: it lets the FBI know
more about the people they serve.
Also send a report to fbi@norfolk.gov
to let the Joint Terrorism THERMCON / COINTELPRO Taskforce know all
about this web site. You're not a good Nazi until you do!
And, of course, we here at the Stop Elmer Fudd web site would love to
hear comments and suggestions for ways to improve this web site. If
you have submissions, corrections, and general improvements, please send
us what you've got and we'll include it all -- anonymously, if you
would perfer -- to the web site. With our thanks!
And to assist you in your insane right-wing Republinazi conspiracy kook rants to the FBI, we here at the Stop Elmer Fudd web site have included a photograph of one of our more manly members, out in the desert digging up a secret, hidden food and water cache. The FBI can use this photograph -- with Elmer complaints to guide them -- to find and stop us here at the Stop Elmer Fudd web site.
We know that your local Field Office of the FBI is greatly interested in knowing all about the evil doers you Elmers like to report and -- being civic minded and patriotic Americans -- we greatly encourage you Elmers to report everything you know about us to your local FBI. (And you should also give your local police office a call just to keep them in the loop on the conspiracy.)
Or you would like to contribute to the conspiracy, here's one of our member's secret PGP key:
-----BEGIN PGP PUBLIC KEY BLOCK----- Version: 2.6.2 mQCNAzCD73oAAAEEAN6Zw/wLbNqafssX3tU5kiCHu/FQRTUHZCHxPJKLuSgDY9HQ ts/SUOrD4zCK+ZWqaL1b0cKpjzmDR8oGcJep8A1SJehOrKM+Cj3AFwWuFWqefwkL 6TSHgO4u8SY4UuiMDmnf6vVaWyvS7qXeG2jV6vCqTPUEASbiRIUvVWO7Oab9AAUR tC5GcmVkcmljIEwuIFJpY2UgPDE6MTAyLzg5MC4wIFRoZSBTa2VwdGljIFRhbms+ =dEQ2 -----END PGP PUBLIC KEY BLOCK-----
Also, you might want to mention that the people here at the Stop Elmer Fudd web site maintain a number of secret hideouts all over the Mojave Desert and in Death Valley as well as at other sites located around the various Southern California and Nevada deserts.
After all, we could be caching and hiding all kinds of shit! out there in the desert. Stuff like:
The fact is that we here at the Stop Elmer Fudd web site are a threat to everything that Elmers stand for; we're a threat to fascism, Totalitarianism, Authoritarianism; we're a threat to everything that the Bush fascist regime stands for. So Elmer, it's your duty to report us to your local FBI! otherwise you're not living up to the fascist ideology you support and defend.
Still not convinced you Elmers need to turn us in? Here's the clincher: We read Edward Abbey books!!!
Those email addresses again:
Agent Mark Blevins at mblevins@fbi.gov
FBI Joint Terrorism Task Force at fbi@norfolk.gov
You can't be an Elmer if you don't report us!
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